Like some folks, I tend to scroll myself to sleep. So I was a confused last night when I saw folks on Twitter talking about Dunkin’ Spiked, a new line of RTD alcoholic Dunkin’ beverages.

Surely this cannot be.

But then I remember the existence of Sunny D vodka seltzer, and I think to myself, no matter how many studies or articles I see telling me that alcohol sales are on the decline and people want more non-boozy options, I know that is a damnable lie.