Boy, that was an action-packed weekend, right?

No, we’re not talking about March Madness—though to all the dudes out there recovering from your vasectomy, I raise a Twisted Tea in your honor.

Of course, we speak of our very own Mascot Madness. And believe me, there were some buzzer-beaters and genuine upsets from our 16 head-to-head death matches on LinkedIn. No surprise that gamers like the Kool-Aid Man, Colonel Sanders, and Tony the Tiger cleaned up in their matches, but Spuds McKenzie and the Morton (COUGHjawbreakerCOUGH) Salt Girl made it to the next round? Also, where were all the horny Gen Z kids when the Mucinex Monster lost to Cap’n Crunch? Cap’n Crunch! A relic of a bygone era devoted to taking down Soggies? Or what of the mustachioed man who likes to rudely put his dirty boots up on whatever is in his path taking down a genuine baller and competitor in Hamburger Helper’s Lefty?